Love works in mysterious ways to our morale

Negin Daneshfar

July 23, 2016


Lost in love and facing the disconnections of breaking up with a partner bring strong encounters to go through at a young age.

Each partner can start to see the pattern of caring about them self more than the other would in the first place. In other words, caring about someone else leaves us selfish and leaves an emptiness to care for either yourself or only for the ones who love us the most. It is true, that love can hurt within interpersonal relationships, whether it be a friendship or lover because love without meaning is just a word and a gesture as humans we create. The harsh realities of love without meaning can leave space to love again or love remains dead. Can a person keep falling loving again if love is dead?

It is known that the personal desires to love eats away and harms relationships. The love triangle of moving on to the next relationship either brings love or harm to the ones we lie too in order to feed ourselves with.

Love as a gesture can be given away and not returned. Love can be a drug, which can make it evil, as well as it is considered the opposite of what is desired as lust. Therefore, love needs to be strong to last with our mutual connections to prosper.

Oxytocin, a love hormone that gets released into the brain, where it creates feelings of empathy, measures how strong a relationship is and helps a person determine the right kind of behavior.

At a speech in Cal State University of Northridge on Tuesday, November 12, Dr. Paul Zak stood in front of an auditorium behind a pile of books to talk about oxytocin and about his just published, “Brain Chemistry: A revolution of the Science, Good and Evil.”

Empathy drives people in social behavior. We, as humans learn the right behaviors through empathy and from the expectations of what an appropriate behavior is, according to Zak.

A touch or hug releases oxytocin in the brain and causes a person to  more likely have a positive reaction with the first person they see or with their first kiss. A sense of empathy forces people care about one another.

“The longer a relationship the more likely neural pathways in the brain can expand and create long term memories,” said CSUN Professor Mark Sergi and neurocognitive specialist.”We tend to remember from our experiences.”

Oxytocin, a chemical that gets released from the pituitary gland is produced in the brain and the blood. Some studies suggest that oxytocin enhances the ability to empathize, connect socially and create long term bonds. If in a long term relationship, breaking up can cause forms of depression to the brain because the oxytocin falls off balance and instead creates distress.

Zak said he studied and measured the amount of oxytocin released at a wedding as part of an experiment. Thirteen people, including the bride and groom, agreed to have their blood taken before and after the ceremony. An increase in the groom’s testosterone levels was found after the bride said her vows.

Oxytocin gets released when testosterone levels increase and moral behaviors, such as trust and love form. Furthermore, an increase in testosterone releases more oxytocin in the brain and makes the bond last long. The wedding formed bonds to support the couple in marriage and answers the question as to why most people have a wedding.

Researchers have found that the drug helps in creating and maintaining monogamy in relationships. The more oxytocin released in the brain the more it triggers dopamine, a neurotransmitter associated with reward and motivation.

According to a study published in the journals Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, men increased oxytocin levels in the brain and showed a renewed attraction for the faces of their romantic partners, but not for equally attractive strangers.

Oxytocin stimulates the reward center in the brain, which helps strengthen monogamy and increases the attractiveness of a partner. In support of monogamy, love prevents men from signaling a romantic interest to other women. “Monogamy voles” between two partners have more receptors for dopamine and more oxytocin receptors in the cortex as well as different regions in the reward system, according to a  L.A. Times article by Geoffrey Mohan published on Nov. 25, 2013.

“What is surprising is that we tend to think of learning as something that only happens deep in the brain after conscious awareness,” said CSUN Pyschology Professor Jose Abara, and Developmental Behavior Neuroscience specialist. “Our behaviors are manifested in response to our emotions and from the experiences we sense.”

People access their thoughts to their current attitudes. neural pathway patterns function in a network of brain cells that store information and are interconnected throughout the cortex. The brain processes memory skills in between synapses and recalls certain memories, like your fist kiss or like your first high school graduation.

The brain also reorganizes in response to new experiences that store sensory information from each part of the brain. Memories are triggered by the senses, which shape what people see.

Whose to take love into there own hands comes somewhere in between our various interconnected relationships if never real to begin with, but used and manipulated. You can see love as an object to the emotions we possess. When love is lost it can manipulate into other forms of use without it visually seen or even go against you and the ones who have always loved or cared for you. Love as a drug unites individuals to belong in social network channels.

Each of these sensations travel to the area of the brain called the hippocampus, centered in the middle of our forehead. This area, makes new memories and integrate the perceptions into one overall experience. In addition, when neurotransmitters, such as dopamine are released they diffuse and attach themselves to other cells making the bond stronger, according to USA Today article by April Holladay published on March 15, 2007.

The effects of oxytocin are similar to a drug for couples in a permanent relationship. Oxytocin sustains the reward centers of the brain and simultaneously relieves stress when activated.

“This could also explain why people fall into depression or deep mourning after a separation from their partner: due to the lack of oxytocin secretion , the reward system is under-stimulated and is in a withdrawal state,” Dr. Rene Hurlemann, executive senior of the Bonn University Medical Center, told Medical News Today in an article published on Nov. 26, 2013.

Another study was done to establish a particular behavior and to find a way to reproduce that behavior. According to Zak, two responses were found on the video, empathy and distress. Empathy released more testosterone whereas distress increased stress hormones. The more oxytocin released in the brain, the more the brain creates a tolerance to empathy and reduces levels of stress.

Oxytocin expresses moral behaviors through supporting interactions with people, which creates these relationships. This can come from a couples, hobbies they share and the happiness in practice can express their feelings of love for one another’s bond.

Supporting interactions stimulate growth in communities. High trust countries have richer communities compared to low trust communities, according to Zak.

“The integrity and depth of your relationship depends on how you feel while interacting with your partner,” Abara said. “Your relationship can drastically improve if you pay attention to how you physically feel around each other.”

Oxytocin has shown to induce pro-social behavior in which people tend to trust each other and feel more attached in response to the chemical. One person’s nice gesture will encourage another’s nice gesture in return, reinforcing the behavior.

“People who have good memory and attention skills are going to be better partners because they both will make better attentive listeners and in turn be better at making conversation,” Sergi said.

Love also works with materials, the number one, which makes the world go around is money. Casually we exchange money and disseminate money back in return, which becomes a useful replacement of love. Selfishness and greed pop in the picture of taking money as a desire or using it as a source of empathy.

Zak researched two group’s behaviors with money as the stimulus to inhibit oxytocin and used trustworthiness as its variable. The study involved two groups of individuals. Each person was given ten dollars for showing up to the experiment.

Each person was paired with another and asked if they want to give up some of the ten dollars to the other person. If the person agrees the amount given gets tripled in the other persons account. Then the person gets to choose to keep all the money or send some amount back.

A moral behavior versus a tempted behavior to money was recognized. According to Zak, 90 percent of the first decision makers sent money and 95 percent, who received the money returned some amount back.

The study found that the more money a person gets, the more the brain produces oxytocin. The 95 percent that returned the money showed that a transfer of money forms an increase in trust.













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